The Merriam-Webster dictionary calls “admiration “a feeling of respect and approval.” I admire someone who has an attitude, character trait, commitment, skill, thought, or understanding that I highly regard. Usually, the achievement I admire is well beyond my current ability.
Admiration can be an important part of living a life worth imitating. When you choose someone to admire, you take the first step toward becoming more like them in some way.
You Can Admire a Trait, Not the Whole Person
Candidly, we can admire someone’s activities, results, etc., despite disagreeing with many of that person’s other thoughts, words, and or deeds. We could use one thing they do as a model, even though other aspects of their life or character might be opposite of who we want to be or do
If you’re a person of faith, consider admirable examples, even from people who understand spiritual matters differently. Capture, keep, and treasure insights, examples, and perspectives on how to lead a worthwhile life.
Consider some of the people you disagree with politically. What traits can you admire, even if you disagree on most issues?
When you admire something in another person that mirrors your values, you can decide to adopt that trait.
Doing is the Important Part
In some ways, living a life worth imitating is an apprentice trade. You learn to live a life worth imitating by watching, listening to, and imitating others. You may admire how another person lives, but wishing and hoping to live that way is not enough. If you want to adopt a behavior you admire, you must act differently.
It goes both ways. Some people will choose to imitate your actions. Your life and choices matter, even when you’re gone. Actions and choices are the primary determinants of legacy and influence, far more than mere intentions or words.
A life worth imitating is not something that will just happen. It is deliberate and purposeful. You choose to aspire to traits you admire. You actively choose to pursue what truly matters rather than passively drifting through life.
You may think that you should adopt a trait or behavior you admire. But before you go ahead, take time to count the cost.
Sometimes, It’s Wise to Decide the ‘Juice Isn’t Worth the Squeeze’
Admiration need not mean you aspire to become the world’s best at something. It does not mean you should perfect a practice or behavior.
Perhaps you would like to be skilled in many things, but you’re not willing to pay the price. One gets to perform at Carnegie Hall because of many hours, weeks, and years of deliberate practice. Most people won’t pay such a high price to attain that level for most things.
Begin by testing the actions you admire against your values. If your values and the actions align well, discover the cost of mastery. If it seems reasonable, test the path for a while, and decide whether you are truly willing to pay the cost. Life routinely provides multiple chances to abandon or renew our commitments.
Growing in a life worth imitating begins with admiring what we see in another person and then deciding to adopt the behavior we admire. We can count the cost and decide whether to try the new behavior. We can choose to keep going or abandon the quest.
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Question: What’s your experience with adopting a behavior you admired in someone else?
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Terry Moore, CCIM, is the author of Building Legacy Wealth: How to Build Wealth and Live a Life Worth Imitating. Read his “Welcome to My Blog.”